


Keelhauled

by Quinnoid



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Airship Crew's perspective on Bertie going on overboard, Canon Compliant, Gen, Set During RQG 63, Swearing, the Only Bertie fic I will Ever write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:40:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26295043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quinnoid/pseuds/Quinnoid
Summary: The events of Bertie going overboard told from the perspective of an airship crewmember.
Relationships: Amelia Earhart (Rusty Quill Gaming) & OCs, Amelia Earhart (Rusty Quill Gaming) & Sasha Racket
Kudos: 9





	Keelhauled

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, I have to thank @mullroy for introducing me to shanty metal, because this fic was born from Keelhauled by Alestorm. Give it a listen if you'd like, it's got such a fun, jaunty tune.
> 
> Second! The names of the mentioned crewmembers are Lotfia Elnadi, Harriet Quimby, Wilmer Sultz, Louis Gordon, Sadie Farrell, and Elbert Ainstein (again, thank you @mullroy for this phenomenal name suggestion).  
> For reference, Lotfia Elnadi and Harriet Quimby are two other amazing aviators from the same time as Earhart, Wilmer Sultz and Louis Gordon were on IRL Earhart's crew, Sadie Farrell was a (possibly mythical) river pirate captain from New York, and Elbert is Kiko's dad.

Farrell was already on deck when she heard the gunshot. A sharp spike of anger and adrenaline had her dashing to the Captain’s side as fast as possible. Without looking, Captain Earhart subtly motioned for her to stand down but be at the ready, all while she argued with the big buffoon in gold armor. Buffoon was too kind, Farrell decided, as the man quickly stripped off his armor and jumped over the side.

“Farrell. How about getting me some oil?” Captain Earhart said over her shoulder, grinning mischievously. Farrell bared her teeth in a feral grin and dashed off to the galley. She didn’t need to know what the Bastard had done, just that the Captain had given her her favorite order. On the way, she ran into Ainstein and a visibly shaken passenger. 

“Alright, Elbert?” She asked. He nodded and Farrell continued to the kitchen, catching Elnadi and Quimby as she went. The three of them ran into the kitchen, where Sultz and Gordon were finishing up preparations for dinner, and Farrell grinned at them. 

“Ya shoulda seen the Cap’n just now!” Farrell burst out laughing, barely able to continue telling the story. “She jus’ talked the Bastard into keelhauling himself! Took his armor off an’ jumped right over the side, an’ he didn’t even make sure he was clipped up. The Nice One barely got a line on ‘im before he jumped.”

Everyone in the galley burst out laughing with her. They all knew who the Bastard was: Sir Bertrand Macguffingham, scoundrel landlubber who treated the Captain and her crew worse than dogs. They had all complained to the Captain when the big idiot got a little too friendly with the wine list, but she promised it was worth the gold they were getting. And if he turned out to be too much of a problem, she could always just shoot him.

“An’ now, Cap’n Earhart wants some o’ the used oil.” Elnadi and Quimby’s faces lit up and they grabbed two large vats of the stuff. Since the hull was designed to be climbed in case a passenger went over, keelhaulings got special treatment with a vat or two of oil to make the climb impossible.

Farrell, Elnadi, and Quimby walked back up top as quickly as possible and stopped behind the Captain and the Nice Passenger. Captain Earhart motioned Farrell and Quimby forward with the first vat, and after the Nice Passenger’s concerns were smoothed over, gave the go ahead for Farrell to tip the oil over the side. It streamed down the ship, coating all the handrails and ledges in a slippery sludge, and splashed down all over the Bastard very satisfactorily. The Nice Passenger watched quietly as he spluttered and roared, and then she began to laugh. Farrell laughed with her.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Needed a bit of a break from the next Food Crimes chapter, and I've had this idea on the backburner for a while. It was good fun to write!


End file.
